About Me

Hi, my name is Miss Behavin.

I am a naughty forty-year-old Real Housewife of Huron County, shamelessly bad mother, fragment-loving wannabe writer and all around badly behaved woman, according to my critics; hence the pseudonym under which I author this blog.

My real name is Carrie.  And this is my husband, Jim.  He is thoroughly charming and the best thing that ever happened to me during the worst possible time in my life. After four years together, he still makes me coffee every morning - and every afternoon at four o’clock -  when he’s home, that is. He’s an enabler to my horrible coffee addiction, which is what I love most about him; that, and his ability to fulfill my every neurotic and co-dependent whim.

Together, we have a son, Corbin, 2, who is responsible for my many neurotic and co-dependent tendencies. He is rambunctious, fearless, inquisitive, and so extraordinarily cute it should be illegal. He gets away with a lot. Because he’s cute.

I also have two gorgeous daughters from a previous marriage, Kara is 10-years-old and Carley is 9-years-old. They were seventeen months apart. Yes, I planned it. Unfortunately, it was with the wrong person. Kara is an incorrigible smart-alec who dreams of growing up and becoming famous, at what - she isn't sure, so long as she makes a ton of money.  Carley is wise beyond her years, a compassionate soul, who dreams of growing up and pastoring a church. At least that’s what they desired twenty minutes ago.

My daughters', the little loves of my life, made a life-changing decision a year ago - they wanted to live with their father - in Indiana, without me! I have posted at great length about this heartbreaking experience.  So, yes - it would appear that I am among the many thousands of monstrous women who are noncustodial mothers.  Because of my experience, I am an activist for parents and their children who suffer from parental alienation at the hands of the custodial parent.  I believe parental alienation is the lowest and most malicious form of child abuse. 

Then there’s John, my introspective 18-year-old adult son from a previous-previous marriage. He resides in Michigan with his Beatles collection and Bob Dylan albums where he can smoke cigarettes and spend the night with his girlfriend, and not hear me bitch about it.  

I never thought I’d be divorced once, much less twice, and I like to think I’ve learned from my experiences as a professional wife and serial marry-er, but I don’t know. While I have learned a great deal about humility and the importance of mutual respect and fighting fair and mind-blowing sex, I only hope the proverb - ‘third time’s a charm!’- is true, because I certainly don’t want to emulate Erica Kane. Or Elizabeth Taylor.

This website is like therapy; it’s a sensible outlet when my fabulous, yet monotonous days are filled with snotty noses, diaper changes and dishes, except it’s cheaper, and hey – I’ve already made most of the mistakes, so you don’t have to.

Welcome to Maneuvering Motherhood.

Straitjackets are by the wall to your left, meds are in the boxes to your right.

Maneuvering Motherhood is currently ranked Number One in the Life Lessons category in NetworkedBlogs on Facebook, in addition to ranking within the Top 10 blogs under Motherhood and Women. 

Enjoy your stay and please visit again soon.